The Plantain
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127 posts Miami Website
Milo is the Editor of the Plantain. He went to college.

How to Afford Miami on $4.2 Million a Year

With rents and housing prices soaring ever higher across Miami-Dade County, how do local millionaires afford to live here? The Plantain set out to find out by talking to Miamians with absurd income levels about how they make life in South Florida work for them. Johnathan Bustello-Schwartzbaum, 31. Job: Johnathan

Lebron To Join 97' Bulls

Lebron James has informed an inner circle of friends and representatives that he has decided to leave the Cleveland Cavaliers to join the 1997 World Champion Chicago Bulls. "Lebron has always been a fan of Chicago and believes he can really thrive under Phil Jackson's triangle offense," said a source

Distracting Anti-Texting Billboard Causes Crash

A billboard warning drivers of the dangers of texting while driving caused multiple crashes since being installed over the weekend. The distracting sign displays a series of emojis followed by a lengthy explanation of what the emoji message means, followed by distracting bold type which says "WHAT COULD BE SO