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Coconut Grove Playhouse Voted Spookiest Place To F*** In

Looking for a thrill? There is only one derelict playhouse you should be lining up around the block to fuck in.

The Coconut Grove Playhouse has been essentially useless since 2006 because of an accumulated debt caused by the high operating costs of running the 1,130 seat theatre. The theatre remains closed to this date, so the Plantain asks...Why not try to catch a spooky nut?

Notable disgraced actor Kevin Spacey has said on many occasions that the Playhouse was his favorite place for a late night escapade, but, realizing the connotation after recent events, quickly apologized and came out again.

"You can't beat the historic significance of the theater that housed the U.S. premiere of Waiting for Godot while you beat some cheeks in the unwieldy albatross of an auditorium," said Playhouse deviant [made up name]. "Imagine you are the lovable hobo duo of Vladimir and Estragon as you make love in this desolate sexscape beside some actual hobos trying to smoke some crack."

So over-come your stage fright and give into your Dionysian urges while making the best use of this historic site in more than a decade.

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Peter Mir is confoundingly the owner of Villain Theater