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Trump To Pardon Hurricane Harvey

Tweeting this morning about whatever popped into his own head, President Donald Trump announced that he was considering pardoning Hurricane Harvey, the embattled storm wreaking havoc on Houston, Texas.

The tweets come just minutes after a news report on CNN that the Houston flooding as a result of Harvey could constitute one of the worst and most destructive natural disasters to occur in the United States and days after Trump issues his first Presidential pardon to an old racist Sheriff in Arizona.

Advisers close to Trump say the President is upset that the press isn't also focusing on the role the streets have in being flooded, saying there are plenty of bad actors involved in Houston's flooding and all the blame can't be given to Harvey.

White House sources say the President is "just lovin" his pardoning power and plans on issuing many other pardons over the next several days. "He just thinks its a blast!" said the source. "He wants to pardon all sorts of people, both real and fictional. I think he is going to pardon Little Finger for the murder of Lysa and John Arryn and treason against the King of the North (the King of the North), and also members of his staff, family, and himself for the whole Russia thing."

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Milo is the Editor of the Plantain. He went to college.
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