A Lamborghini on fire has become the ultimate status symbol for South Beach’s ultra-rich.
“There is nothing hotter right now than pulling up to the City’s most fashionable clubs or restaurants in a Lambo with an engine fire,” says Deco Drive’s Lynn Martinez. “If you walk down Ocean Drive, neon colored sports cars are a dime a dozen. But nothing places an emphasis on your disposable income than a total loss Lamborghini on fire in front of a trendy nightclub.”
“Oh, it’s on fire, whatever,” replied 31-year-old Brandon Rothwell, son of film producer Reginald David Rothwell casually as he pulled into the valet outside of LIV Night Club. “I guess I’ll just take the helicopter or limo back to Star Island,” said Mr. Rothwell as he flipped the keys, also on fire, to valet Ernesto Perez.
“Oh dios mio! Oh dios mio! Where is the fucking fire extinguisher,” said the 26-year-old valet as he worked frantically to put out the fire by spraying the $280,000 car with foam.
“It’s a total loss,” said Mr. Perez somberly. “I could have probably saved it if I didn’t have to wait for the car’s owner to finish taking selfies in front of it for so long,” said the valet who works exclusively on tips as he realized the car’s total loss will likely mean he won’t receive the customary few dollar stipend from Mr. Rothwell for returning the car at the end of the night.
Authorities and safety experts are warning Lamborghini owners to avoid purposefully causing their vehicle to set on fire, but with celebrities such as Justin Bieber, Pitbull, and Walter Mercado all being photographed outside of burning cars, it is unlikely the trend will stop any time soon.
For those wishing to set their own Lamborghini on fire, there are multiple YouTube videos that offer instructions. “The process is pretty simple,” says YouTube star Henry Gelson, whose instructional video has attracted over 13M views:
“If you recently purchased a Lamborghini, simply rev the engine in front of a nightclub or at a red light near another sports car until it burst on fire from the exhaust to the hood. Most people will ridicule you, but stand firm to your decision by lighting up a Cuban with the flames and looking onlookers in the eye through either aviators or Wayfarer sunglasses. Once the majority of the body is matte with molten paint, step outside and post a picture with the hashtag #LamboOnFire and #JustAnotherDay.”
By Manny Garavito of MiamiComedy.Com