"Michelle Obama ‘Doesn’t Look Or Act’ Like A First Lady"

Liberals are at it again, complaining like giant snowflakes that Melania Trump was "insensitive" because she wore a jacket with the message "I REALLY DON'T CARE, DO U" while boarding a plane to see a bunch of enslaved children imprisoned on the border. Well, "womp womp," as Corey Lewendoswky's saying goes. Where were all of these social justice warriors when Michelle Obama decided to wear a sleeveless dress? Exactly.

Melania put on an entire jacket, which she wore over a long sleeve shirt. Her sleeves had sleeves! Those are twice the sleeves. Melania is twice the First Lady Michelle Obama ever was. She's basically the Second First Lady, or maybe just Second Lady? Probably the Second Lady. Does that means Stormi Daniels is the First Lady? I guess technically Melania is more accurately the Third Lady, because Ivana and Marla Maples are the First and Second. But where does that leave Ivanka? Uch, stupid liberals. Case closed.

Keith, the Plantain's conservative correspondent.