The U.S. Bureau of Economic Analysis released its long-awaited report on the effects of mass culture on the GDP. The Report found that U.S. employers lost more than 1 trillion dollars in revenue from employees talking about how much they hated last night’s episode of Game of Thrones.
“So, I guess the fact that Jon Snow was the rightful heir to the Iron Throne didn’t matter at all?” was identified by the Report as the 4th biggest complaint about the show’s finale, behind “why wouldn’t the other kingdoms demand independence?” “why wouldn’t the unsullied and Dothraki just kill Jon” and “what is Bran smoking anyway?” These complaints, and so many others, combined to cause nearly the entire U.S. working population to effectively cease all beneficial productivity.
“It’s crazy! All anyone is doing is talking about Game of Thrones. I’m thinking about sending my entire staff home since no one is working,” said one office manager, “but then I wouldn’t have anyone to talk about last night’s episode, so I figured we should probably all stay at work.”
Notably, 20% of the wasted time by U.S. workers was attributable to that one person in your office who keeps telling you that she has never seen an episode. “Shut up, Karen. It’s not impressive that you don’t watch a TV show.”